May 6th, 2009

tattoo part 2

I was excited about having it done, but not as up as before. I've rated my mood as a minus number for the last week despite lots of good things happening. I've been trying to see all the positives, whilst not wanting to ignore and brush under the carpet any negative feelings.

So I got to the studio early, so i sat in the van and rang Marilyn. I got sidetracked, and then forgot to drink my water. When I eventually got there, I realised I hadn't eaten, so I got a falafel sandwich. I went in and started eating it, but some people came in, and i just can't eat in front of strangers. So i probably could have done with more food, and definitely with more liquid

My legs were jiggling in the waiting area, and then throughout the tattooing. It hurt a lot more, cause it's on my shoulder amongst other things. I actually couldn't control my legs. I was tensing them against the wall, but when i stopped tensing, i couldn't stop them banging against the chair. I was really embarassed when dave suggested i walk around rather than kick the crap out of his chair. So then of course i felt bad about kicking his chair, so i started getting that guilty feeling creeping over me when i've done something wrong.

Dave's really good at distracting people though. we chatted again about my art course, and the wet spot, and how nice Vicky (of the wet spot) is, and where he had tattoos. But i kept jiggling, and kept shaking my head, probably cause i was getting drowsy.

Once it was finished, I told dave that i wasn't sorry it was over, but that he hadn't put me off getting more. I'm after a third insect on my upper arm, probably in an amber colour. I'm not sure what to have, so any ideas for symbolic insects would be good. Anyway, he photographed it, i forgot this time, and then tried to stay awake while i drove home.

I really love the tattoo though. As soon as i got home i finished my sandwich, got an orange juice, and i feel great! i'm so annoyed with myself for not being more enthusiastic about the tattoo at the time.

they'll be a better photo tomorrow when I get Bart to take one, but for now